Speaking: Interactive Communication B2 - Lesson 4: Negotiating Meaning & Reaching Compromise
Welcome back! In teamwork, business, and even personal relationships, people often have different ideas or priorities. A truly skilled communicator knows how to negotiate1 effectively, not to "win," but to understand the other person's perspective and find a compromise2 that works for everyone.
The 3-Step Path to Agreement
A successful negotiation isn't a fight; it's a structured process of understanding and collaboration.
The "Understand - Propose - Agree" Framework
- Step 1: Understand Their Priority (Negotiate Meaning)
- Before you can find a solution, you must fully understand the other person's needs. Don't assume you know—ask clarifying questions.
- "So, if I understand correctly, your main concern is..."
- "Could you help me understand why the timeline is so important for you?"
- "Just to clarify3, what is the key outcome you're looking for?"
- Step 2: Propose a "Middle Ground" Solution
- Once both priorities are clear, suggest a solution that gives something to both sides.
- "How about we try...?"
- "Perhaps we could find a middle ground4. What if we...?"
- "Here’s a possible compromise: we could..."
- Step 3: Confirm the Agreement
- Once a good compromise is on the table, clearly state your acceptance.
- "Okay, that sounds like a fair compromise."
- "I can agree to that. Let's move forward with that plan."
Scenario: Planning a Company Event
Listen to two colleagues, Thida and Piseth, trying to decide on the food for a company party. Notice how they move from disagreement to a successful compromise.
Thida: "For the year-end party, I think we should have a formal, sit-down dinner."
Piseth: "I'm not so sure. I think a casual buffet would be better so people can move around and socialize."
Thida: "But a formal dinner feels more special and celebratory."
Piseth: "Okay, so **if I understand you correctly, your main priority is making the event feel special and elegant?**" (Step 1)
Thida: "Exactly."
Piseth: "And my main **priority5 is making sure it's social and interactive. **What if we try a compromise?** (Step 2) We could have a 'standing reception' with high-quality, elegant finger foods and passed canapés, instead of a buffet. That way, it feels high-class like you want, but people can still walk around and mingle, which I want."
Thida: "Hmm, elegant finger foods instead of a buffet... **Okay, that sounds like a fair compromise. I can agree to that.**" (Step 3)
The Language of Collaboration
The tone of your negotiation is critical. Use collaborative language to show you are working together, not against each other.
Use "We" and "Us," not "I" and "You":
- Less Collaborative: "I want this, but you want that."
- More Collaborative: "It seems we have different approaches. How can we find a solution that works for us?"
Focus on Interests, Not Just Positions:
- A Position: "I want a formal dinner."
- The Interest Behind It: "I want the event to feel special."
When you understand the underlying interest, you can find many different ways to satisfy it (like in the scenario, where elegant finger food also satisfied the interest of "feeling special").
Practice Quiz: What's the Function?
Read the phrase and identify its function in a negotiation.
1. "What if we agree to your timeline, but we use my proposed budget?"
A) Clarifying a point.
B) Proposing a compromise.
C) Agreeing to a compromise.
→ Answer: B. This is a classic compromise structure, offering to accept one person's condition in exchange for them accepting yours.
2. "So, just to be sure I understand, the main issue for you is the deadline, not the cost. Is that right?"
A) Holding the floor.
B) Reaching a compromise.
C) Negotiating meaning.
→ Answer: C. This is a perfect example of a clarifying question to make sure you understand the other person's priority before moving on.
Your Mission: Role-Play a Compromise
Your mission is to practice the three-step framework in a simple, low-stakes role-play.
- Find a friend or classmate to practice with.
- Choose a simple disagreement to role-play. For example:
- One person wants to watch an action movie; the other wants to watch a comedy.
- One person wants to go on holiday to the mountains; the other wants to go to the beach.
- Follow the framework:
- Speaker A: State your preference.
- Speaker B: Don't state your preference yet! First, **clarify** Speaker A's priority (e.g., "So you want to watch an action movie because you're in the mood for something exciting?").
- Speaker A: Agree.
- Speaker B: State your preference and priority.
- Someone must then propose a compromise (e.g., "What if we watch your action movie tonight, and we agree to watch my comedy next weekend?").
- The other person must **formally agree** ("Okay, that works for me. It's a deal.").
Vocabulary Glossary
- Negotiate: (Verb) - ចរចា - To have a formal discussion with someone to reach an agreement. ↩
- Compromise: (Noun) - ការសម្របសម្រួល - An agreement where each side gives up some of their demands to find a solution. ↩
- Clarify: (Verb) - បញ្ជាក់ - To make something easier to understand by giving more details or a simpler explanation. ↩
- Middle ground: (Idiom) - ចំណុចកណ្តាល - A position or opinion that is between two extremes and that is acceptable to both sides. ↩
- Priority: (Noun) - អាទិភាព - Something that is considered more important than other things. ↩